Kyoto, Japan
Joined on 9/8/15
Posted by Precipitation24 - October 6th, 2023
The remix of Invention15 BWV786 by J.S. Bach is frontpaged! Thank you, Newgrounds! Thank you, everyone!
But in the case of this song, I think a lot of the credit should go to J.S. Bach. He is a great musician.
Incidentally, my favorite example of Bach's song being remixed is Rumpel's Party Palace by Mike Simpson in Shrek Forever After. I don't know why, but I personally think that remixes of Bach's song tend to sound like Halloween songs.
Posted by Precipitation24 - August 23rd, 2023
The song for the Newgrounds Underdogs’ Audio Contest (NGUAC) 2023 Knock-out Round is frontpaged! Thank you, Newgrounds! Thank you, everyone!
I didn't win the prize in NGUAC itself, but I'm happy now.
When I make a song, I always learn Western songs and songwriting ideas (and the more I learn, the more I feel that FL Studio is optimized for Western music creation), but recently good songs have also appeared in the world of Japanese vocaloid, so this time I tried to make a song based on them. In this song, I used some techniques that are often used in them, such as noise-gated piano and yona-nuki scale (F-B-less scale?), and I was worried whether this song would sound good for people in Newgrounds, but I am very happy that this song was frontpaged!
Posted by Precipitation24 - July 28th, 2023
When I watch YouTube in Japanese, I sometimes get the urge to translate it into English and introduce it to someone. In this series of articles, I would like to introduce you to something that Japanese people enjoy on a daily basis, and that you would not have had the chance (or need) to encounter without my introduction.
Japan has had a story format called "kaidan (怪談)" since ancient times, which literally means "horror stories". Incidentally, Jeff the Killer, Slenderman, the Russian Sleep Experiment, and the SCP series are also popular in Japan, and these kinds of stories now form a category called "Western kaidan". As you may have guessed, kaidan and urban legends are often confused, and there is currently no clear distinction. However, I think that since the word "kaidan" is now used to describe "horror stories" in general, urban legends can be considered a genre of kaidan or horror stories in this sense.
In Japan, it is customary in August to get together with several friends and perform kaidan in a dark room. I actually have some original kaidan for this event, but I won't cover them in this article. Instead, in this article, I would like to introduce kaidan that were told in the Japanese TV show "松本人志のぞっとする話 (Hitoshi Matsumoto and Horrifying Stories)". This is a show in which a famous comedian, Hitoshi Matsumoto, and other comedians get together and perform kaidan that they have experienced.
This time I would like to translate and introduce my favorite kaidan performed by comedians. But since I'm not a native English speaker, please let me know if there's anything to correct.
“UFO” by Miyasako
That night, Miyasako had a drink with his friends at a bar in Shibuya. In the seat next to them, two men were drunk and talking happily. The two had a boss-subordinate relationship, and an older man who seemed to be the boss spoke to Miyasako. After talking for a while, it turned out that both men were pilots. So Miyasako asked the question he always wanted to ask when he met a pilot: "I am not sure if I can ask you this, but have you ever seen a UFO during a flight?" Then the two pilots suddenly fell silent. After a while, the older pilot said, "Of course, I have." A young pilot tried desperately to stop him, but the older pilot said, "I'm retiring today, so there is no problem telling the truth."
According to him, every time a pilot renews his license, he is asked, "Have you seen anything strange during your flights?" and if the pilot answers truthfully, he is considered insane and forced to quit his job.
"What do you mean by 'truthfully'?" Miyasako asked.
"Miyasako, there is no pilot who has never seen a UFO," he said. "I can't count how many times I've seen them."
Since they were both drunk, Miyasako could not deny the possibility that they were joking, but Miyasako could not believe that they were lying.
Later, when Miyasako told this story to a friend whose father was a pilot, he said, "I know this story. It is taboo for pilots. A pilot who was a colleague of my father once found a huge flying object on the route. He thought that not only his plane but also other planes using that route would be damaged, so he reported it to the control tower, but later he resigned as a pilot."
"The Girl on a Swing" by Haranishi
When Haranishi was a junior high school student, he didn't like to study before exams, so he would sneak out in the middle of the night and sit on a bench on a small hill nearby and talk. That night, Haranishi and his friend K came to the hill as usual, but another friend B didn't come. Haranishi said, "B is late. Let's go get him," and they went to B's house. At the bottom of the hill was a park and a vending machine. When Haranishi looked into the park after passing the vending machine, he saw a girl in a white dress playing alone on a swing.
"Didn’t you see a girl?" asked Haranishi.
"What are you talking about?" said K.
“There was a girl on the swing in the park," said Haranishi. "Let's go back to see it."
As Haranishi said, K looked into the park from the back of the vending machine and suddenly screamed. K and Haranishi ran to the bench on the hill.
"Did you see her?" asked Haranishi.
"Yes, she was playing on the swing," said K.
After a while B came.
"Hey, didn't you see the girl in the park?" asked Haranishi.
"No, I didn't see anything," B replied.
"We both saw the girl. Let's look at her again," Haranishi said.
The three of them went to the vending machine.
"Let's all three look at her at the same time," Haranishi said. "1, 2, 3..."
Surprised to see the girl again, the three ran up the hill as fast as they could.
"There was a girl," said Haranishi.
"She was on the swing with her head down!" said K.
"No," said B.
"No? We did see her on the swing," said Haranishi.
"No, the girl was smiling at me," said B.
A few days later, B was hit by a truck and died.
"Kaidan" by Ueda
Ueda was having a party with his friends. Then someone suggested telling kaidan one by one. However, Ueda didn't know much about kaidan, so he decided to improvise a story. It was a story about a self-immolation in a parking lot near the house, and night after night the ghost of a woman who committed suicide appears. His friends were unexpectedly interested in the story and got excited saying, "It's a scary story!" and "The parking lot is near my house!"
When Ueda walked home alone after the party, he saw a woman walking by wearing a miniskirt even though it was winter. She approached Ueda and said, "Excuse me, I am lost. Could you tell me the way to XX?" Ueda realized that it was the place where the parking lot appeared in the kaidan he had created. Although he was suspicious, Ueda told her the way, and she thanked Ueda and left. After taking a few steps, she suddenly turned and said, "I'm glad you know me. "
"The Nephew" by Yoshii
This is the story of how Yoshii lost his mother five years ago.
Yoshii lost his father before his mother died, and he and his mother took the nephew to visit his father's grave. Then he suddenly pointed to Yoshii's mother and said, "Grandma is going to die!" Yoshii asked him why, and he said, "Grandma will die because there is a black figure behind her." Of course, neither Yoshii nor Yoshii's mother could see such a person. The nephew said, "When Grandpa died, there was a black figure behind him, so Grandma will die too."
Three months later, Yoshii's mother fell ill and was taken to the hospital, where it was discovered that she had terminal cancer and only had a few months to live. Yoshii's mother was admitted to the hospital that day.
Her room was on the third floor, the top floor of the hospital. One day, when Yoshii and the nephew went to visit her, he ran around the second floor even though he knew her hospital room was on the third floor. The nephew said, "The black figure behind Grandma is on the second floor today, so maybe Grandma is here too." Finally, he entered room 204, but it was empty and no one was there. In fact, Yoshii’s mother was on the third floor as usual that day. Yoshii talked to his mother about the mysterious behavior that day, but could not find the exact reason.
A few days later, in the middle of the night, he received a call from the hospital saying that Yoshii's mother was in critical condition. Yoshii immediately rushed to the hospital, and as he was about to go up to the third floor where his mother was, a nurse stopped him and said, "Her room has changed. I'll take you to the room." The room she led Yoshii to was room 204. Yoshii called out to his mother, but she did not answer. Her heart rate continued to drop and Yoshii thought she would die soon. Then Yoshii's mother suddenly woke up, and asked "Who?"
"Mother, I am your son." Yoshii said.
"No," she said. "Who are the black figures in this room?"
Yoshii's mother died after saying these words.
"Newspaper Delivery" by Ayabe
Ayabe had a part-time job delivering newspapers. Among the houses that subscribed to the newspapers, there was an old house on the corner. The front door of the house was made of frosted glass, and the inside of the house was not visible. The front door had a mailbox, and all the mail came right into the house. He put a newspaper in that house's mailbox every day, and every time he returned after delivering it to another house, that house's newspaper disappeared.
There was only one old woman who lived alone in that house. One day, when Ayabe went to her house to collect the subscription fee, the old woman said, "Thank you for always delivering the newspaper to my bedside." Of course, Ayabe never entered the house, so he thought she was mistaken.
Another day, when he put the newspaper in the old lady's house, Ayabe decided to see what was happening to the newspaper. It turned out that the newspaper was being slowly pulled by someone in the house. But the frosted glass didn't show the figure of the person pulling the newspaper. Ayabe thought it was strange and pulled the newspaper that was being sucked into the house. Then the power to pull the newspaper became stronger. Ayabe pulled the newspaper back with more force, and the mysterious power to pull the newspaper inside became stronger. For a while, Ayabe was pulling the newspaper, but suddenly a figure that looked like a French doll appeared in the frosted glass of her entrance.
He didn't know if the doll pulled the newspaper, or if someone pulling the newspaper slammed the puppet against the door, but after that he quit the job.
"The Friend's House" by Yoshii
One day, Yoshii had a party with five friends. The house of the friend who hosted the party was a small and shabby apartment, and he had to use a public toilet just outside the apartment.
Yoshii and his friends gathered at the house and had a party until the early morning. Before going to bed, Yoshii went to the front door to go to the bathroom and found the front door open and a strange man in a yellow hoodie standing there. When the man found Yoshii, he shouted, "Good morning! " Yoshii replied, "Good morning." Then the man left. After a while, Yoshii remembered that his friend had an office near his apartment and thought he might be an employee there.
After a while, one of Yoshii's friends left the apartment to go to the bathroom, and when he came back from the bathroom, he said, "Hey, there was a man who jumped in front of the entrance and said 'Good morning' to me! Who was that?!" Yoshii told him about the man, and it turned out to be the same man he had seen. None of them knew the man, but that day they came to the conclusion that he might be a newcomer to the nearby office.
The next night, Yoshii's friend called him and told him to turn on the TV and watch the news. When Yoshii turned on the TV, the newscaster was talking about something that happened outside the apartment where he had a party yesterday. The headline said, "A slasher appeared in the shopping district. Many people were injured." The screen cut to an interview with their eyewitness who said, "A man in a yellow hoodie was screaming and stabbing people." The screen cut back to the newscaster saying, "Police also say the suspect said, 'I stabbed them because they all ignored my greeting.'"
"The Girlfriend Who Can See Ghosts" by Hamaguchi
Hamaguchi's girlfriend can see ghosts. She lived in Hamaguchi's house. That day, Hamaguchi had to go to work early in the morning and left her alone in his house. When he came home, she looked at Hamaguchi's face in horror and asked, "Hamaguchi? The real Hamaguchi?" and when she found out that he was real, she suddenly started to cry. Hamaguchi asked her why, and she told him what had happened to her that day.
When Hamaguchi left home that day, she was suddenly struck with paralysis while sleeping in bed. Then someone came into the room and said, "I'm home!" He looked like Hamaguchi and had a similar voice, but she felt that he had no soul. She continued to ignore the voice, and eventually it disappeared. When she went to sleep, she was paralyzed again. Then something resembling Hamaguchi came back into the room and said, "Wake up! I’m home! Wake up!" But his voice became muffled and distorted. She continued to ignore the voice, and suddenly an unfamiliar voice said, "Oh, you noticed," and disappeared.
"Taiwan Trip" by Watanabe
Watanabe's mother is Taiwanese, and Watanabe traveled to Taiwan often from an early age. Whenever she visited Taiwan, she stayed with her mother's sister. The house was on the fifth floor of an apartment building, and many of Watanabe's mother's relatives lived on other floors, and they would have a party somewhere every day. That day, Watanabe, her mother, and her younger and older sisters were there.
Around midnight, her mother's sister said, "I have to work tomorrow, so I'll go home first," and went back to her room on the fifth floor. Early in the morning, when the party was over and Watanabe returned to her sister's room on the fifth floor, the door was locked with a chain from the inside and wouldn't open. Her mother thought it was strange and broke down the door and went in to find her sister in her underwear, tied up with a rope.
Her mother quickly untied the sister and asked her what had happened. She said she had been robbed. When Watanabe turned on the light in the room, the whole room was a mess and there was a knife on the floor. Cell phones were not common in Taiwan at that time, and the landline had been disconnected, so Watanabe ran to call relatives in the neighborhood for help.
On the way, Watanabe met a man. Watanabe tried desperately to explain the situation, but she didn't speak Taiwanese. He asked her again and again, but in the end he probably said something like, "I'm sorry, I don't understand what you're saying and I can't help you. Sorry," and walked away.
Watanabe went to her relative's house, explained the situation, and asked him to come to her mother's sister's room. Several people had gathered in the room and saw what had been stolen. When her mother asked her sister, "What did the thief look like?" she replied, "A fat man in a blue checkered shirt suddenly entered my room." Hearing this, Watanabe turned pale because the man she had just spoken to was also fat and wore a blue checkered shirt.
"The Grandmother" by Nakanishi
Nakanishi's grandmother often asked him, "Have you ever seen a ghost? " The reason she asked such a question was because many in Nakanishi's family could see a ghost. In fact, Nakanishi's grandmother could also see a ghost, and it is said that she experienced spiritual phenomena on several occasions. Nakanishi's grandmother told him a story about Nakanishi's father.
A long time ago, when Nakanishi’s father was a young child, Nakanishi's grandmother took him to a sento (public bathhouse; people used public bathhouses because there were no bathroom in many houses in Japan). On their way home, Nakanishi's grandmother felt a chill and stopped. The place where she stopped was the entrance to a path with fields on either side. Looking ahead, she saw several old women working in the fields in the dark. Her grandmother thought it was something they shouldn't see, and she thought they should stay off the path. But she didn't want to frighten her little son, so she said, "Let's go home another way." Then he pointed to the field and asked, "What are they doing?" The grandmother was surprised and said, "Can you see that? Listen, they are ghosts. We should ignore them when they talk to us." His father said, "Okay, Mom," pointing to their grandmother's side. "Should I ignore this person?"
This is the end of the kaidan stories I have selected. Thank you for reading to the end.
Kaidan is a work that has meaning only when told by a skilled storyteller, so I think there are many parts that I could not convey the charm of kaidan in my translation, but I hope this article is interesting from a folklore point of view.
Please point out any grammatical errors in my English. Also, I would appreciate it if you would tell me about Kaidan that you know.
Posted by Precipitation24 - July 7th, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
Have you ever read the novel "ZEBRA and Other Stories" by Chaim Potok?
ZEBRA is a touching story of friendship between a boy named Zebra, who broke his arm, and a man who lost an arm in the Vietnam War and later teaches an art class at the school during the summer vacation. I heard that it is so well known in the U.S. that it appears in many textbooks. In fact, in Japan, a translated version of ZEBRA has also appeared in textbooks, and every elementary school student in Japan knows this story.
One day, I was curious what the "Other Stories" were, so I bought the book on Amazon. Unfortunately, the Japanese version was not available, so I bought the English version published in New York instead. I read some of it and was surprised by the content: ZEBRA could be included in an elementary school textbook, but all the other short stories are sexually explicit, possibly because they all deal with adolescent boys and girls. But that is one of the reasons I like this novel.
Among them, I really liked the story "ISABEL". The plot of this novel is as follows:
At the age of 14, Isabel lost her father and brother in a car accident. Isabel is so grief-stricken that she begins to hallucinate about her father and brother. Meanwhile, Isabel's mother met a man named Charles Magruder. He, too, had lost his wife to breast cancer and was living with a daughter, Betsy. Isabel's mother and Charles became close and eventually married, and Isabel and Betsy suddenly became stepsisters. This story is told from Isabel's point of view, from the time her mother met Charles to their wedding day.
In this article I would like to introduce a part of ISABEL, one of the other stories from "ZEBRA and Other Stories" by Chaim Potok. I have also written my Japanese translation as an exercise for myself. This may not be necessary for you, but please let me do it.
If you are interested, please stop reading this article and buy "ZEBRA and Other Stories" right now.
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“What was your dad like?”
Isabel was quiet a moment. Then she said in a low voice, “My dad was, mostly, sort of easygoing. He liked telling us funny stories.” As she talked, she heard her father’s laughter in the hallway outside Betsy’s room. “He saved people’s lives. He was always reading medical journals, and he liked listening to opera. Sometimes he and my mom would shout at each other, but they loved each other a lot. Sundays we’d all go out for long walks or on picnics or to Longwood Gardens or the zoo. He made great salads and pasta. What was your mom like?”
“My mom had this great sense of humor and liked everyone and always said whatever came into her head. She wasn’t, well, she wasn’t all that good-looking, but everyone liked her. She and my dad, they fought a lot, mostly about his drinking. But I think they were really in love. Can I tell you something?”
“What?”
“Your hair, it’s so long and beautiful. Did your dad have red hair?”
“My dad’s hair was brond,” Isabel said.
“Can I touch it?” Betsy asked, and without waiting for reply, put her hand on the hair alongside Isabel’s forehead. Isabel felt Betsy’s fingers lightly stroking her hair and saw a strange look enter her eyes: they appeared to grow enormous, translucent, the color of watery gray ink. She ran her tongue over her lips, drew her upper lip back, and caught her lower lip between her teeth.
“It’s like silk,” Betsy said.
Isabel stepped back “Please don’t,” she said.
(Chaim Potok, "ZEBRA and Other Stories", Alphred A. Knopf, Inc., 1998, pp.110-111)
[My translation]
「あなたのパパはどんな人だったの？」
イザベルは一瞬沈黙していた。そして低い声でこう言った。「私のパパは、いっつも、なんだかのんきな人だった。おかしな話をするのが大好きで…」彼女がそう言ったとき、ベティの部屋の外の廊下で父親の笑い声が聞こえてきた。「人の命を助けてた。いつも医学の雑誌を読んでて、オペラを聞くのが好きだった。ときどきママとけんかすることもあったけど、すごく愛し合ってた。日曜日にはみんなで出かけてピクニックに行ったり、ロングウッド庭園に行ったり、動物園に行ったりしてた。サラダとパスタを作るのがうまかった。あなたのママはどんな人だったの？」
「私のママはユーモアのセンスがピカイチで、みんなのことが大好きで、思いついたことは何でも言っちゃうような人だった。ママは美人なほうじゃなかったけど、それでもみんなママのことが大好きだった。ママとパパはしょっちゅう、たいていはパパの酒癖のことでけんかしてたけど、愛し合ってたと思う。それから、ひとつ言ってもいい？」
「何？」
「あなたの髪、とっても長くてきれいね。あなたのパパも赤い髪だったの？」
「私のパパは金髪だった」イザベルは言った。
「触ってもいいかしら？」ベティは尋ねた。そして返事を待たずして、彼女はイザベルの額に流れる前髪に手をおいた。イザベルはベティの指が髪を軽くなでるのを感じ、彼女の目に奇妙な表情の浮かぶのを見た。ベティの目は大きく見開かれ、透明で、水っぽい灰色のインクのようだった。彼女は唇の上に舌を這わせ、上唇を後ろに引き、下唇を歯の間に挟んだ。
「シルクみたい」ベティは言った。
イザベルは後ずさりして「お願い、やめて」と言った。
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Translation Note:
Unlike the work of J.D. Salinger, which I discussed in the previous article, Chaim Potok's work is written in simple English that is easy for beginners to understand, and translation is not very difficult. However, as I followed the text closely, I made unexpected discoveries.
In this part of the story, Isabel's attachment to her mother, who decided to remarry without consulting her, fades, and at the same time, Betsy, who was in a similar situation to Isabel when her mother died and her father remarried, empathizes with Isabel's emotional trauma and takes on a role in healing her heart.
================================
Isabel stepped back “Please don’t,” she said.
Betsy lowered her hand. “My hair feels like rope,” she said.
“It looks pretty.”
“It’s stringy and dry and ugly,” Betsy said.
“It’s not ugly.”
“Isabel, you don’t have to say things to make me feel better.”
Isabel felt her face burning.
“When my mom died and people were saying all those things—‘She’s at peace now, dear’ and ‘May you be spared further grief, dear’ and ‘Your mom’s no longer suffering, dear’—I swore to myself I’d never say dumb things like that, I’d say what I felt, and if anyone asked me how I felt about my mother dying, I’d say I I felt like shit. But you know something? No one asked me.”
“I’m sorry,” Isabel murmured.
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Betsy said. “We got that cleared up. What I wanted to say was that your mom has nice skin and nice hair and a really cool, sexy figure. And she and my dad have slept together.”
Isabel stood absolutely still, staring at Betsy.
“In my dad’s bedroom. They thought I was asleep.”
“I don’t think I want to hear about it,” Isabel said after a moment.
“Do you have a problem with me telling you that?” Betsy asked.
“I just don’t want to know about it,” Isabel said.
Betsy gave her a severe look “I thought you’d want me to share everything with you, since we‘re going to be one family.”
Isabel felt little shivers of nausea.
(Chaim Potok, "ZEBRA and Other Stories", Alphred A. Knopf, Inc., 1998, pp.110-111)
[My translation]
イザベルは後ずさりして「お願い、やめて」と言った。
ベティは手をおろした。「私の髪はなんだかロープみたい」彼女は言った。
「かわいいわよ」
「糸みたいで、乾いてて、なんだか不格好で…」ベティは言った。
「そんなこと…」
「イザベル、私を慰めるようなこと言わなくてもいいわ」
イザベルは顔が燃えるような気分がした。
「私のママが死んだときもみんなこう言った。『ママは安らかに眠っている』とか『早く悲しみから抜け出せるといいわね』とか『君のママはもう苦しまなくていいのよ』とか。でもその時、心に誓ったの。私だったらそんなマヌケなことゼッタイに言わない。私は思ったことをきちんと言うわ。もし誰かが私のママが死んだことをどう思うかって聞いてきたら、私はきっとこう言う、そんなのクソくらえだって。でもわかるでしょ？誰もそんなこと聞いてこない」
「ごめんなさい」イザベルはつぶやいた。
「いいのよ、いいの」ベティは言った。「はっきりしてよかった。私が言いたいのは、あなたのママ、お肌もきれいで髪もきれい、とってもクールで、それから可愛い。それにママとパパ、もう一緒に寝てるみたい」
イザベルはベティを見つめて固まった。
「パパの部屋でね。私が寝てるって思ってたのかしら」
「そんな話聞きたくなかった」しばらくたってイザベルはそう言った。
「何か聞きたくない事情でもあった？」ベティは尋ねた。
「ただ単に聞きたくなかっただけ」イザベルは言った。
ベティは険しい表情をして言った。「隠し事なんかなしにしてほしいのかと思ってた。だって私たち家族になるから」
イザベルは嫌悪感からか、わずかな寒気を覚えた。
================================
Translation Note:
Although Betsy's circumstances are similar to Isabel's――the loss of her mother, her father's remarriage, and a change of residence――she is rarely portrayed as emotionally damaged (if anything, she only averts her face during the scene of her parents kissing at the wedding). Betsy appears, at least from Isabel's point of view, to be an independent and strong woman.
This is the end of the article. The protagonists of "ZEBRA and Other Stories" are all adolescents, and they all find their own solutions to their most difficult problems, with a happy ending. This is a good novel, and I would like to recommend it not only to the children in the story, but also to the parents of adolescent children. Thank you for reading to the end.
Posted by Precipitation24 - June 13th, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
Lately, I have been thinking that I need to set the standard for what I am most interested in about English. I need to make sure what I want to know the most and what I don't need to learn in a hurry. If I am not sure what to ask, teachers will not give me the answers I want most. Recently, ChatGPT made me even more aware of this.
What is most important to me? As I explained in my previous article, non-native speakers learn English for a variety of reasons. In my case, for a long time, the reason was to pass the entrance exams for Japanese schools and to qualify as a teacher in Japan. After graduating from high school, some people still study English for the purpose of studying in an English-speaking country; others study English because they have a boyfriend/girlfriend who lives in an English-speaking country. But in my case, the main purpose of learning English is to be able to post my art on Newgrounds. This is an important task for me. Therefore, reading and understanding English texts perfectly and writing appropriate expressions is my most important mission.
On the other hand, I don't need to practice my speaking skills as much, because unfortunately I don't plan to (or cannot) look for a job abroad.
In conclusion, I am most interested in the meaning of English sentences, especially "what impression the sentence makes on you".
I found an interesting example of this problem in the video from Kevin's English Room (in Japanese), which is now my biggest English learning channel.
How are you の返し方: How to respond to "How are you?"
嘘乙www by 日本人: You're kidding LOL by a Japanese
I'm fine. はおかしい!?: Is "I'm fine" unnatural?!
In this video, Kevin mentioned how native speakers would feel if someone responded, "I'm fine, thank you. And you?" which is the most common phrase we learn in Japanese schools:
"...First of all, 'And you?' is a very uncomfortable phrase for me. It sounds like a superficial conversation between aristocrats. Only a princess would say it!"
"...For me, 'I'm fine' has a negative connotation, like 'Leave me alone!' I feel like you don't want to communicate with me anymore."
They then discussed what we can use instead of "I'm fine" and in this part Kevin explained a lot of useful knowledge.
“I’m happy.”
The other guy suggested this phrase, and Kevin replied, "Scary. I would think you were a psycho killer. It sounds like '(*grin*) ... Happy.' Scary, isn't it?"
According to Kevin, "How are you?" is just a greeting, so the person asking doesn't care if you're happy or not. So the answer "(I'm) happy" is far from what the questioner would expect. He also said that if you want to express that you are in a happy mood, you could say "I feel good," "I'm really excited," or if you want to include the word "happy" so bad, "I feel kinda happy" would be natural.
“Quite well.”
This is a polite response you can use in a business situation. The person who asks, "How are you?" will feel that you respect them. Kevin has personally recommended this phrase. "Quite" is the key word. It sounds like British English.
“I’m doing excellent.”
Sounds like a teacher in a good mood. It is also a polite expression.
Going back to my personal question, I got a lot of interesting insight into my question, and I learned a slightly different question from the video: "Who do you think the speaker would be?" like "And you?" sounds like a princess language, and "I'm doing excellent" sounds like a teacher language.
I would also like to add another question to my list of favorite questions: "Is it appropriate to the context?" I won't say what the exact word was, but I remember a native speaker giving me this advice: "I understand what you're trying to say, and that sentence is grammatically correct, but I've only seen that word in XXX videos!" This question may look different from the previous two, but I think it is also about "how native speakers would feel", so I want to add it to my list. Of course, this problem is a little easier to solve for non-native speakers, because we can estimate the usage in big English dictionaries. But we have to be careful.
In conclusion, I have made the following list of questions that I am most interested in.
My personal list of questions:
1. How does it sound?
2. Who do you think would say it?
3. Is it appropriate to the context?
I would like to study English from this point of view from now on, and if you have interesting stories about these questions, please let me know!
Posted by Precipitation24 - May 6th, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
Japanese is an "agglutinative" language. In short, this language changes the nuance of a verb by adding different morphemes after it. The best example of this is in the imperative. There is a verb "yameru" which means "to stop" in Japanese. The imperative form is "yamero" which means "stop it!" and is made up of the stem "yame" and the suffix "ro" to make it imperative. Interestingly, you can tell who is speaking in which situation by the difference in the suffix that makes it imperative.
yamero, yameroyo, yameroya, yamerotte; Used by men/boys. yamero is the easiest and most aggressive way. yameroyo is used between friends. yameroya is used as a joke by western Japanese toddlers. yamerotte is also used as a joke when your friend keeps annoying you.
yamete, yameteyo, yametetteba; Used by women/girls. yamete is the simplest style and is used between friends and family. yameteyo is mostly used in more serious situations. yametetteba is used when someone keeps annoying you.
yametekudasai; Used in doujinshi. No need to explain.
Japanese people can roughly guess the situation by reading or listening to the one expression. Then I thought there must be a similar phenomenon in English, but I cannot find so many references. On rare occasions, some native speakers tell me something like, "This language is only spoken by women," but it is very rare. But this is what I want to know the most.
Since I cannot find such reliable examples, I first wrote as many variations of "stop it" as I could.
Stop it!
The most basic way. I have heard both men and women use this phrase. This is a simple imperative form, so I understand it to be the phrase I should not use.
You stop it!
I learned that adding "you" to the beginning of a sentence makes the sentence sound more offensive. In the Disney movie Zootopia, there is a scene where Juddy's neighbors keep saying, "You shut up," and I learned that this is very offensive language, If I hear this phrase in reality, maybe I should literally freeze there.
Stop it, please. / Please stop it.
I have learned that adding "please" to a sentence does not change the fact that it is an imperative tone and I should still avoid using this phrase. But I also feel that by adding "please" we can better express that we are really annoyed by someone's action.
Can/Could/Will/Would you stop it?
After some research, I found the polite way. But there are four grammatically equivalent ways. I cannot tell the difference, but I know there is a difference. There must be some clue to feel the nuance or the situation, like "Can you..." is used by XX when XX is XXing, but I could only get a little literature to evaluate it.
I found an interesting example. "Would you please stop!" seems to be a gentleman's way of saying he does not want to talk about something. This is a line from a novel. It does not seem impossible to statistically analyze its use in context and guess the usage of the phrase, but for non-native speakers it is very time-consuming, and no matter how hard I tried, there might be some uncertainty.
I learned another interesting thing. According to this (Japanese) website, there are three levels of "stop it: "Stop it!" → (keep annoying) → "Stop doing it!" → (keep annoying) → "Cut it out!" The last phrase was new to me, but perhaps this phrase contains the clue to guessing the situation. They introduced other phrases like "Quit it!" and "Knock it off!", but I gave up trying to distinguish them.
I found another interesting example in this video.
"Native, natural English that you can't learn in school 'Stop it!'" by Hapa 英会話
The English teacher, Sarah, said that "Oh, stop it!" is practically used by a woman who is being complimented by someone. So when we read or hear this expression, we can roughly guess the situation: A woman is being complimented by someone and she is embarrassed, but she doesn't really want him to stop. This is a specific and cultural example, but a good one. I learned another interesting use of "stop it."
Incidentally, I feel that only the phrase "Stop it!" covers a very wide range of situations. So I thought that especially in English, tone is also an important factor. For example, I learned many phrases that I should never use in everyday conversation, such as "I don't know," "I know, I know," and "No, thank you." However, every time I learned each phrase, my English teacher emphasized that it depends on how you say it.
"English that Japanese people tend to say but are actually rude" by Kevin's English Room
According to Kevin, these expressions are basically not polite, but if you say them in an appropriate tone, there is a possibility to sound polite: "I...(*thinking*) do-don't know.", "Oh, I 'know (stress)', I know!", "Um,...(*smile*) no,.. thank you." But, of course, there are rude expressions no matter how you say them, such as "You'd better...". Um, I'd better be careful.
Posted by Precipitation24 - April 30th, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
How you learn a foreign language differs from person to person because it depends on what you want to do with your language skills. In my case, the main purpose is to exchange ideas about pop culture, technology, and literature, so my reading and writing skills have been developed more than my speaking skills. In other words, I am particularly bad at speaking English. However, my English teacher Hironobu Takeoka said that reading aloud is the best way to learn English, so I have been practicing reading long English texts aloud for a long time, and I am actually better at reading them quickly. However, my English pronunciation is still at a low level.
Incidentally, I found an interesting question about English on Quora: "What is the English word that Japanese people cannot pronounce?" I have seen many interesting words around such questions, "rural"?, "mischievous"?, "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious"? Yes, these words are among them. But I think they forget the simplest word: "girl".
Even in Japan, the word "girl" is a common word, so almost all Japanese know its meaning and even use it in practice. But I remember the first time I heard the word "girl" pronounced by a native speaker. I was very surprised. I could not understand what they were saying.
I cannot understand which letter starts when and when the sound changes to the next letter. And because I cannot understand the sound, I cannot pronounce it correctly.
But why is it so hard? I have come up with a clear explanation.
Let's go back to the famous fact that Japanese cannot pronounce the English "R" and "L" sounds. This is true because I am bad at it. When I speak English, I always have to watch out for the danger of "rice" sounding like "lice" and "election" sounding like "e-ection. The word "girl" contains both, so I guess the difficulty of pronunciation is at least doubled. But no, it is not that simple.
First, I would like to talk about the "L" sound. When I hear native speakers pronounce "girl," I feel that the sound of "L" becomes clearer. In general, when pronouncing other L-ending words, I think I can use the "not pronouncing it" technique. For example, these words sound a little easier to pronounce:
However, when I pronounce "girl," I must clearly pronounce the American "L" sound. I still do not know the exact mechanism, but when I listened to the sound slowly, I heard the "L" sound begin before the previous sound ended. I know you don't understand what I'm saying, but this feeling is clearly explained as the "ə" in /ɡɝ.əl/. Anyway, when I pronounce "girl," the problem with the "L" sound suddenly becomes an insurmountable challenge for me.
Second, the pronunciation of the "R" is difficult on its own, but the problem becomes more complicated when the letter "I" is added.
What is "ɝ"? It sounds both "UR" and "AR" to me. In the UK that part is pronounced "ɜː" which is a little easier for me. But when I am in the USA, I have to pronounce the "ɝ" sound.
In conclusion, when I pronounce the only four-letter word "girl," I have to fight against the two evolved forms of "L" and "R"; "Clear L" and "I and R". This is the reason why pronouncing the word "girl" is especially difficult for Japanese.
I am always looking for a way to pronounce such a word more easily. For example, there are some hacks to pronounce some words like a native speaker. What I independently found is that if you pronounce the five basic vowels, e-a-i-a-o, quickly, you can pronounce "Ariel" like Eric in Disney's "The Little Marmaid," but I am not sure if this works for other people from non-English speaking countries. Also, as you may have noticed, the pronunciation is slightly off. It doesn't make any sense LOL
[for Japanese Learners]
I think the bias of the Japanese language makes the situation worse. English beginners in Japan tend to speak English with katakana sounds in their heads. And the word "girl" is pronounced as "ガール (gāru)" in Japanese.
The sound of "IR" is basically pronounced as "Ā". Japanese people subconsciously assume that native speakers would pronounce it similarly, but they actually pronounce it quite differently. We try hard to correct the pronunciation, but it is also true that for a long time we recognized "girl" as "gāru". As a result, we suffer from the big difference for a long time.
Posted by Precipitation24 - January 31st, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
There are many ways to learn English in Japan. Personally, I think the most effective way is to communicate with native English speakers, and the second most effective way is to watch YouTube videos in/on English.
This time, among many English learning videos, I would like to introduce a Japanese YouTube channel, Kevin's English Room.
[Japanese video] A Realistic Usage Course on Native Fxxk! It Doesn't Always Mean Bad?!
ネイティブのF××Kのリアルな使い方講座！悪い意味じゃないの！？
リアルなFxxkの使い方：The use of "Fxxk" in real life
What!? Fxxk me!っていうふうに：Just like, "What?! ~ me!"
チャンネル登録：SUBSCRIBE
Yama (left; やま): An English learner.
Kevin (middle; ケビン): Born and raised in the US. Bilingual in English and Japanese.
Kake (right; かけ): A regular Japanese guy.
There are three people in this channel, and Kevin, a native English speaker, shares with us his knowledge of English as it is actually used in the U.S., which is different from the English taught in schools. As a Japanese, this video made me realize that my image of English and actual English are two very different things.
Incidentally, I understand that this article is totally pointless because Kevin speaks English much better than I do and can easily make videos in English only. However, if their YouTube videos do not have subtitles (not automatically generated) and you do not know the channel because of that, I think it might be useful to translate the Japanese spoken in the video into English and introduce what they are saying.
This video shows how native speakers use "~" in everyday conversation. Although this word is considered a dirty word in Japan, the video explains that there are many vocabularies in which "~" is used.
1. ~ you!
Even the Japanese know this insulting word. Never use this word if you want to leave the USA alive.
2. ~!
This one-word exclamation is used to express a variety of "intense" emotions, such as joy, anger, sadness, and pleasure.
"~! Yes!"
"~! No, I'm so sad."
3. ~ing + (adjective)
Used to emphasize the meaning of the adjective (positive or negative).
~ing smart
~ing tasty
~ing slow
~ing sad
According to Kevin, these three uses cover 70% of all ~s in the US. Then the other two guys say, "OK, let's finish this video," but Kevin says that's where the meat and potatoes come in.
4. ~ me!
Basically, it is a soliloquy used to express one's intense disappointment in oneself for repeating the same mistakes or suffering the same mishaps. However, in rare cases, it is also used to compliment a friend who threw a surprise birthday party for you.
5. What the ~?
Used when things that are happening now are beyond one's understanding.
"What the ~?! This was not broken 5 minutes ago."
"Five billion dollars? What the ~?! Really?! No, I can't receive that."
6. I don't give a ~!
A phrase that indicates you are not interested in the topic being discussed. A phrase similar to "I don't care". Yes, in this phrase, "~" means "care."
"I don't give a ~ about your story."
"I know that you don't give a ~ about your health, but you should take more vitamin C." "Oh, no no no, I give a ~."
"Stop giving a ~."
7. ~ off!
Simply means "Go away!"
8. ~ face.
Words to say to someone you really dislike. This expression contains the word "face," but it can also be used to belittle someone on the Internet whose face you cannot see.
9. "the ~" + Intransitive Phrasal Verbs
"Shut the ~ up! (= Shut up!)"
"Get the ~ off! (= Get off!)"
"Hurry the ~ up! (= Hurry up!)"
"Get the ~ down! (= Get down!)"
The two sentences above would have the same meaning if the "the ~" were omitted, but including that word emphasizes your frustration.
Finally, Kevin says that if you are not a native English speaker and do not fully understand the meaning and use of "~", you should never use it. Native speakers use "~" in everyday conversation because they fully understand the dangers of this word. However, you should be aware that even if a native English speaker uses "~" a lot without knowing that you are not a native English speaker, he or she may not be angry with you or mean to hurt you.
Posted by Precipitation24 - January 20th, 2023
Recently there was some good news, especially for me: DeepL has released a beta version of DeepL Write. This tool is developed on the basis of DeepL, widely known as the best AI translator in the world. It is very easy to use: enter some text in the input field, DeepL Write will check the spelling and grammar, and within a few seconds will show you the text with some words replaced by a better rendition.
I am not a native English speaker, so I cannot judge how natural the corrected text is, but maybe that is why I need such a tool. As a test, I asked DeepL Write to correct my English in the previous two articles, on the works of J. D. Salinger and Osamu Dazai, and was very surprised when it pointed out a number of elementary errors in my English. As noted by DeepL Write, these two articles have now been corrected.
With the advent of this tool, I felt that the need to learn English was more diminished, but Jaroslaw Kutylowski, CEO of DeepL, said that this tool is only an assistant to your creativity and that you should not blindly trust it. But I am convinced that thanks to this tool I will be able to communicate with you in more readable English.
Lastly, it may sound cliché in this kind of topic, but this article is also checked by DeepL Write.
Posted by Precipitation24 - January 5th, 2023
I love English and was once good enough to become an English teacher at a Japanese junior high school. But that was in the past, and since then my English skills have been declining rapidly. So, as part of my language learning, I decided to post some simple questions and comments about the English language that are not easy for me (and that I should ask on HiNative or Quora) on Newgrounds. I am not an expert in English and may make elementary mistakes, but thank you for your patience.
In the previous article, I introduced "The Catcher in the Rye" by J. D. Salinger, which was popular among many young people in the United States. This time, I would like to introduce "No Longer Human" by Osamu Dazai, which was popular among many young people in Japan.
https://www.academia.edu/23537185/No_Longer_Human_by_Osamu_Dazai
After writing this work, he ended his short life by committing suicide by drowning himself and his lover. The novel clearly records what drove him to do this, which is why it moved the hearts of young Japanese people at the time.
It is also surprising to me that it was translated by Dr. Donald Keene, an internationally renowned scholar of Japanese literature. He knew so much about the Japanese language that he is considered a person who knows the Japanese language much better than the Japanese people. When I try to point out errors in his translations, there is a high probability that I will find that "I" do not understand my native language. His English translation is at such a high level that Japanese students of English are not recommended to read it, just as "No Longer Human (人間失格)" is not recommended to non-Japanese speakers of Japanese. However, I used to have enough English to become a Japanese junior high school teacher and should be able to read it!
In this article, I would like to ask him to tell me, as a Japanese person, how he has interpreted Japanese literature.
================
PROLOGUE
I have seen three pictures of the man.
The first, a childhood photograph you might call it, shows him about the age of ten, a small boy surrounded by a great many women (his sisters and cousins, no doubt). He stands in brightly checked trousers by the edge of a garden pond. His head is tilted at an angle thirty degrees to the left, and his teeth are bared in an ugly smirk. Ugly? You may well question the word, for insensitive people (that is to say, those indifferent to matters of beauty and ugliness) would mechanically comment with a bland, vacuous expression, "What an adorable little boy!" It is quite true that what commonly passes for "adorable" is sufficiently present in this child's face to give a modicum of meaning to the compliment. But I think that anyone who had ever been subjected to the least exposure to what makes for beauty would most likely toss the photograph to one side with the gesture employed in brushing away a caterpillar, and mutter in profound revulsion, "What a dreadful child!"
Word list (from Weblio and Wiktionary):
bland: (figuratively) Lacking interest; boring; dull.
vacuous: Empty; void; lacking meaningful content.
modicum: A modest, small, or trifling amount.
(Selected by Weblio, an English-language dictionary website in Japanese, with a study level of 10 or higher)
[Original text]
私は、その男の写真を三葉、見たことがある。
一葉は、その男の、幼年時代、とでも言うべきであろうか、十歳前後かと推定される頃の写真であって、その子供が大勢の女のひとに取りかこまれ、（それは、その子供の姉たち、妹たち、それから、従姉妹たちかと想像される）庭園の池のほとりに、荒い縞の袴をはいて立ち、首を三十度ほど左に傾け、醜く笑っている写真である。醜く？けれども、鈍い人たち（つまり、美醜などに関心を持たぬ人たち）は、面白くも何とも無いような顔をして、
「可愛い坊ちゃんですね」
といい加減なお世辞を言っても、まんざら空お世辞に聞えないくらいの、謂わば通俗の「可愛らしさ」みたいな影もその子供の笑顔に無いわけではないのだが、しかし、いささかでも、美醜に就いての訓練を経て来たひとなら、ひとめ見てすぐ、
「なんて、いやな子供だ」
と頗る不快そうに呟き、毛虫でも払いのける時のような手つきで、その写真をほうり投げるかも知れない。
================
The prologue was not written by the protagonist of the novel, but by someone who was doing research on him. He describes the appearance of a certain person in a photograph, who is the protagonist of this work and the author himself. The child in the photo is not really laughing, but pretending to do so because he understands that it pleases the adults, but the art-loving artist sees through the lie.
If "The Catcher in the Rye," introduced in the previous article, is the story of a young boy struggling to save pure children from adult deception, this story depicts the anguish of Dazai, who became aware of adult deception at an early age and learned to adapt to it.
Translation memo:
Dr. Donald Keene is certainly an excellent translator. It is an accurate translation from a Japanese point of view. I would like to make this part of this article not a correction of his translation, but a place to share my knowledge specific to Japan.
Dr. Keene translated his costume as "brightly checked pants," but the original text is "荒い縞の袴 (lit. roughly striped hakama)." Hakama is the traditional Japanese formal wear for men.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hakama#Men's_hakama
================
Indeed, the more carefully you examine the child's smiling face the more you feel an indescribable, unspeakable horror creeping over you. You see that it is actually not a smiling face at all. The boy has not a suggestion of a smile. Look at his tightly clenched fists if you want proof. No human being can smile with his fists doubled like that. It is a monkey. A grinning monkey-face. The smile is nothing more than a puckering of ugly wrinkles. The photograph reproduces an expression so freakish, and at the same time so unclean and even nauseating, that your impulse is to say, "What a wizened, hideous little boy!" I have never seen a child with such an unaccountable expression.
Word list (from Weblio and Wiktionary):
pucker: (transitive, intransitive) To pinch or wrinkle; to squeeze inwardly, to dimple or fold.
freakish: Strange, unusual, abnormal or bizarre.
nauseating: Causing a feeling of nausea; disgusting and revolting.
wizened: Withered; lean and wrinkled by shrinkage as from age or illness.
(Selected by Weblio, an English-language dictionary website in Japanese, with a study level of 10 or higher)
[Original text]
まったく、その子供の笑顔は、よく見れば見るほど、何とも知れず、イヤな薄気味悪いものが感ぜられて来る。どだい、それは、笑顔でない。この子は、少しも笑ってはいないのだ。その証拠には、この子は、両方のこぶしを固く握って立っている。人間は、こぶしを固く握りながら笑えるものでは無いのである。猿だ。猿の笑顔だ。ただ、顔に醜い皺を寄せているだけなのである。「皺くちゃ坊ちゃん」とでも言いたくなるくらいの、まことに奇妙な、そうして、どこかけがらわしく、へんにひとをムカムカさせる表情の写真であった。私はこれまで、こんな不思議な表情の子供を見た事が、いちども無かった。
================
His self-loathing description goes on. Incidentally, there is a Japanese term, "猿真似 (lit. monkey-mimic)," which refers to the act of imitating visuals without understanding the philosophy. A well-known example is Vigneau's satirical drawing of Japan in the late 19th century, in which he imitates Western clothing.
================
The face in the second snapshot is startlingly unlike the first. He is a student in this picture, although it is not clear whether it dates from high school or college days. At any rate, he is now extraordinarily handsome. But here again the face fails inexplicably to give the impression of belonging to a living human being. He wears a student's uniform and a white handkerchief peeps from his breast pocket. He sits in a wicker chair with his legs crossed. Again he is smiling, this time not the wizened monkey's grin but a rather adroit little smile. And yet somehow it is not the smile of a human being: it utterly lacks substance, all of what we might call the "heaviness of blood" or perhaps the "solidity of human life"—it has not even a bird's weight. It is merely a blank sheet of paper, light as a feather, and it is smiling. The picture produces, in short, a sensation of complete artificiality. Pretense, insincerity, fatuousness―none of these words quite covers it. And of course you couldn't dismiss it simply as dandyism. In fact, if you look carefully you will begin to feel that there is something strangely unpleasant about this handsome young man. I have never seen a young man whose good looks were so baffling.
Word list (from Weblio and Wiktionary):
adroit: Deft, dexterous, or skillful.
fatuous: Obnoxiously stupid; vacantly silly; content in one's foolishness.
(Selected by Weblio, an English-language dictionary website in Japanese, with a study level of 10 or higher)
[Original text]
第二葉の写真の顔は、これはまた、びっくりするくらいひどく変貌していた。学生の姿である。高等学校時代の写真か、大学時代の写真か、はっきりしないけれども、とにかく、おそろしく美貌の学生である。しかし、これもまた、不思議にも、生きている人間の感じはしなかった。学生服を着て、胸のポケットから白いハンケチを覗かせ、籐椅子に腰かけて足を組み、そうして、やはり、笑っている。こんどの笑顔は、皺くちゃの猿の笑いでなく、かなり巧みな微笑になってはいるが、しかし、人間の笑いと、どこやら違う。血の重さ、とでも言おうか、生命の渋さ、とでも言おうか、そのような充実感は少しも無く、それこそ、鳥のようではなく、羽毛のように軽く、ただ白紙一枚、そうして、笑っている。つまり、一から十まで造り物の感じなのである。キザと言っても足りない。軽薄と言っても足りない。ニヤケと言っても足りない。おしゃれと言っても、もちろん足りない。しかも、よく見ていると、やはりこの美貌の学生にも、どこか怪談じみた気味悪いものが感ぜられて来るのである。私はこれまで、こんな不思議な美貌の青年を見た事が、いちども無かった。
================
In his school days, he was handsome and must have been very popular because he had developed a good fake laugh. However, the author also feels uncomfortable with the atmosphere he creates in this photo. It is as if he is an inanimate object pretending to be human. From this description, I personally believe that he hid his feelings from the people around him and communicated only through socialization techniques that he had learned as knowledge, such as how to make a smile. In other words, his laughter is similar to the laughter that "JOKER" makes, which is independent of emotion.
Translation note:
The sentences in the last part of this paragraph are so long and the sentence structure so difficult to understand that even advanced students of Japanese will have difficulty interpreting the meaning of the sentences. But again, his translation is accurate. To be more precise, he does not translate directly from Japanese, but he understands perfectly what is expressed in the original text and uses his genius translation skills to write his novel in English.
Personally, I have also learned something new from reading his English translations. In the original, "鳥のようではなく、羽毛のように軽く" is a part that I also skip because I do not understand the meaning, but when I read the English phrase "it has not even the weight of a bird. It is merely a blank sheet of paper, light as a feather," I understood that his smile did not have "the weight of blood = the weight of a bird. I have no doubt that his understanding is much deeper than mine.
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The remaining photograph is the most monstrous of all. It is quite impossible in this one even to guess the age, though the hair seems to be streaked somewhat with grey. It was taken in a corner of an extraordinarily dirty room (you can plainly see in the picture how the wall is crumbling in three places). His small hands are held in front of him. This time he is not smiling. There is no expression whatsoever. The picture has a genuinely chilling, foreboding quality, as if it caught him in the act of dying as he sat before the camera, his hands held over a heater. That is not the only shocking thing about it. The head is shown quite large, and you can examine the features in detail: the forehead is average, the wrinkles on the forehead average, the eyebrows also average, the eyes, the nose, the mouth, the chin ... the face is not merely devoid of expression, it fails even to leave a memory. It has no individuality. I have only to shut my eyes after looking at it to forget the face. I can remember the wall of the room, the little heater, but all impression of the face of the principal figure in the room is blotted out; I am unable to recall a single thing about it. This face could never be made the subject of a painting, not even of a cartoon. I open my eyes. There is not even the pleasure of recollecting: of course, that's the kind of face it was! To state the matter in the most extreme terms: when I open my eyes and look at the photograph a second time I still cannot remember it. Besides, it rubs against me the wrong way, and makes me feel so uncomfortable that in the end I want to avert my eyes.
Word list (from Weblio and Wiktionary):
foreboding: A sense of evil to come.
(Selected by Weblio, an English-language dictionary website in Japanese, with a study level of 10 or higher)
[Original text]
もう一葉の写真は、最も奇怪なものである。まるでもう、としの頃がわからない。頭はいくぶん白髪のようである。それが、ひどく汚い部屋（部屋の壁が三箇所ほど崩れ落ちているのが、その写真にハッキリ写っている）の片隅で、小さい火鉢に両手をかざし、こんどは笑っていない。どんな表情も無い。謂わば、坐って火鉢に両手をかざしながら、自然に死んでいるような、まことにいまわしい、不吉なにおいのする写真であった。奇怪なのは、それだけでない。その写真には、わりに顔が大きく写っていたので、私は、つくづくその顔の構造を調べる事が出来たのであるが、額は平凡、額の皺も平凡、眉も平凡、眼も平凡、鼻も口も顎も、ああ、この顔には表情が無いばかりか、印象さえ無い。特徴が無いのだ。たとえば、私がこの写真を見て、眼をつぶる。既に私はこの顔を忘れている。部屋の壁や、小さい火鉢は思い出す事が出来るけれども、その部屋の主人公の顔の印象は、すっと霧消して、どうしても、何としても思い出せない。画にならない顔である。漫画にも何もならない顔である。眼をひらく。あ、こんな顔だったのか、思い出した、というようなよろこびさえ無い。極端な言い方をすれば、眼をひらいてその写真を再び見ても、思い出せない。そうして、ただもう不愉快、イライラして、つい眼をそむけたくなる。
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In the third photo, he no longer smiles, and his expression is drained of life and personality. The author is interested in what made him that way and will appear next in the epilogue.
Translation note:
The part that Dr. Keane translates as "his hands held over a heater" is "火鉢に両手をかざし (lit. his hands held over a hibachi)" in the original text. A hibachi is a traditional Japanese heating device for making a small fire.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hibachi
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I think that even a death mask would hold more of an expression, leave more of a memory. That effigy suggests nothing so much as a human body to which a horse's head has been attached. Something ineffable makes the beholder shudder in distaste. I have never seen such an inscrutable face on a man.
THE FIRST NOTEBOOK
Mine has been a life of much shame.
Word list (from Weblio and Wiktionary):
ineffable: Beyond expression in words; unspeakable.
beholder: Someone who observes or beholds; an observer or spectator.
inscrutable: Difficult or impossible to comprehend, fathom or interpret.
(Selected by Weblio, an English-language dictionary website in Japanese, with a study level of 10 or higher)
[Original text]
所謂「死相」というものにだって、もっと何か表情なり印象なりがあるものだろうに、人間のからだに駄馬の首でもくっつけたなら、こんな感じのものになるであろうか、とにかく、どこという事なく、見る者をして、ぞっとさせ、いやな気持にさせるのだ。私はこれまで、こんな不思議な男の顔を見た事が、やはり、いちども無かった。
第一の手記
恥の多い生涯を送って来ました。
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Here the prologue ends and the chapter entitled "The First Notebook" begins. This notebook consists of three chapters, each corresponding to the three photographs introduced in the Prologue.
Translation note:
It is interesting that he used the term "death mask" to describe his "死相 (lit. dead face)". The term 死相 means the face of a dead person, as seen in a coffin, and he used the word "death mask" to emphasize the lack of life in his expression.
Finally, at the time of its translation by Dr. Donald Keene, the novel actually attracted attention in the U.S. as a novel about the "sexual abuse of boys". In this work, he was sexually abused as a child by adults, and his experience of loneliness and inability to tell anyone about it greatly influenced his personality. I would like to end this article by picking it up.
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...My true nature, however, was one diametrically opposed to the role of a mischievous imp. Already by that time I had been taught a lamentable thing by the maids and menservants; I was being corrupted. I now think that to perpetrate such a thing on a small child is the ugliest, vilest, cruelest crime a human being can commit. But I endured it. I even felt as if it enabled me to see one more particular aspect of human beings. I smiled in my weakness. If I had formed the habit of telling the truth I might perhaps have been able to confide unabashedly to my father or mother about the crime, but I could not fully understand even my own parents. To appeal for help to any human being―I could expect nothing from that expedient. Supposing I complained to my father or my mother, or to the police, the government―I wondered if in the end I would not be argued into silence by someone in good graces with the world, by the excuses of which the world approved.
![[Remix] J.S. Bach: Invention15 BWV786](https://img.ngfiles.com/defaults/icon-audio-smaller.png?f1707337412){kind=icon}
